How Your Negative Body Language Is Damaging Your Self-Confidence and Self-Esteem
Do you have negative body language?
Have you ever walked into a room and instantly sensed someone was upset, even though they hadn’t said a word? That’s the power of body language at work. It speaks volumes without uttering a single sound.
Body language includes posture, gestures, and facial expressions that transmit messages to those around us. While positive body language can boost the energy of a conversation, negative body language is just as powerful but in a damaging way.
Negative body language can manifest itself in different forms. These subconscious cues can significantly impact how others perceive us. It can create barriers in communication, lead to misunderstandings, and even hurt relationships—not to mention the toll it can take on our self-confidence. So, let’s see if YOU display negative body language and what you can do about it. Here are eight negative body language signals that could mess up your self-esteem.
Having a Weak Handshake
![A handshake is the first connection you create with a person regarding touch. A handshake is the first connection you create with a person regarding touch.](https://media.gettyimages.com/id/1511464706/photo/doctor-patient-and-handshake-in-hospital-thank-you-welcome-or-greeting-for-medicine-trust.jpg?b=1&s=2048x2048&w=0&k=20&c=uvQJuWAQrql0sUzFB4d1o8qZ2k3niHwvGsWTaNBJ1KU=)
Bad Posture
Do you slouch? If the answer is yes, you need to change your posture because it’s causing you negative body language. Most people have developed bad posture while standing, walking, and sitting. You should have your shoulders back and your chest forward. This indicates a confident person who’s easygoing and comfortable in their skin.
Taking a power pose, merely by pushing your shoulders back and lifting your head a bit, boosts testosterone, which helps with confidence while lowering cortisol, the hormone linked to stress, says Aligned Modern Health. Changing your bad posture isn’t always easy because most people have become used to it. But trust us—putting in the effort is well worth it!
Poor Eye Contact
Do you always seem to look down or away when your eyes meet another person’s? If yes, you have weak or poor eye contact, giving you negative body language. This is probably the easiest and first step to take to improve yourself.
Good eye contact means looking at someone straight in the eyes and maintaining the look for a few seconds. Avoiding eye contact altogether can make you appear inattentive, unreliable, and unworthy of what’s presented to you, like a relationship, task, or responsibility. Remember, don’t overdo it. Don’t stare—that’ll likely be creepy to the other person. Staring is looking at someone emotionless. The correct facial expressions accompany good eye contact.
Crossing Your Arms
![Long-haired woman standing with arms crossed Long-haired woman standing with arms crossed](https://media.gettyimages.com/id/967091776/photo/long-haired-woman-standing-with-arms-crossed.jpg?b=1&s=2048x2048&w=0&k=20&c=895n69g65X-BGI_pI9TItFg1iva9WiPEexiWnQRAR4o=)
Don’t cross your arms all the time because this signifies that you’re a closed-off person or trying to hide something. This defensive stance is a perfect example of negative body language. You won’t win over any new friends when your arms are crossed. You may be saying one thing, but your body says something else.
For instance, if you tell your friends that you loved their barbeque party or sporting event you attended, yet your arms are crossed, you come across as uncomfortable and nervous. Your body language is communicating something different than your remarks. You’ll try to hide your true feelings, but you’ll contradict yourself. For self-confidence to be developed and nurtured, being true to yourself is necessary. If that party was boring, don’t be afraid to say it. Display the proper body language, and confidence will manifest itself.
Failing to Smile
Smiling is an essential but often forgotten way of communicating, and failing to do so can contribute to your negative body language. It takes little to no effort and energy to crack a smile. It’s integral to how people perceive you.
Do you want to appear to be an open and friendly person? Just remember to smile. Your wonderful smile can change an uncomfortable and nerve-wracking situation into a memorable experience. Smiling has such an infectious and surprising effect that a Scandinavian study discovered people had difficulty frowning when looking at other smiling people.
When you smile, you’re conveying that you’re an easygoing individual. For instance, if you start a conversation with a stranger, the likelihood of them being receptive to you will be improved by your smile.
Touching Your Face
![Who is this man I've become? Who is this man I've become?](https://media.gettyimages.com/id/643310558/photo/who-is-this-man-ive-become.jpg?b=1&s=2048x2048&w=0&k=20&c=VIZhvE83Rfibk0189l9lK6_6Zug6ec71IW19c2YMD-c=)
Constantly rubbing your nose, eyes, and face at every opportunity is considered negative body language. The nervousness and tension are destroying you inside. If you’re in the middle of a conversation with someone, this becomes distracting to the other person. You won’t be able to clearly lay out your message to your audience. Remember that if you have an itch, scratch it quickly and be done with it. What’s important to note is that excessive face touching indicates discomfort and nervousness.
Fidgeting
If you’re nervous in a social situation, it might be that stressful situation you’ve found yourself in. You must learn to be comfortable with it if confidence is to be nurtured in you. You might frequently bite your fingernails, count your fingers, or rub your hands together. You can also take some of the items within your reach, like a pen, and play with them. For instance, you’ll take the pen and start biting it or rolling it in your hands.
Being comfortable with yourself can handle this boredom and nervousness, ultimately eliminating negative body language. There are also ways of moving your hands in a manner that signifies you’re nervous or bored. If you’re used to engaging in this habit, discarding it won’t be a breeze, and you won’t change it overnight. It’s probably one of the surest signs that you’re really nervous and uncomfortable in a new environment like a crowded place. Fidgeting less is the first goal to aspire to. If you’re in an anxious situation five times a day, try not to fidget in three of them. This will gradually help you cope with uncomfortable circumstances.
Nervously Playing with Hair
![Struggling with hair pulling Struggling with hair pulling](https://media.gettyimages.com/id/483588277/photo/struggling-with-split-ends.jpg?b=1&s=2048x2048&w=0&k=20&c=SX7JDUEvewt4sBX4ho7u_agcGQ6nIiB3V6xy9igdndk=)
Constantly playing with your hair shows you’re anxious and nervous. You’re flicking and rubbing your hair every second. We get it! Your hairstylist did a fantastic job. But that doesn’t mean you have to touch it at every opportunity. We’re not saying that every time you feel your hair, you’re essentially nervous. But it can be evident if too much hair flicking, touching, or rubbing becomes distracting. You can feel the tension, and the discomfort is overwhelming.
Conclusion
Negative body language can significantly impact your self-confidence and how others perceive you. By being aware of these negative signals and making conscious efforts to change them, you can improve your interactions and boost your self-esteem. Remember, small changes in your body language can lead to significant improvements in your overall confidence and how you are perceived by others. So, stand tall, make eye contact, smile, and present yourself with confidence. Your self-esteem will thank you. If you would like to explore how solution focused hypnotherapy can boost your confidence, self-esteem book a consultation now at the Halifax Hypnotherapy Clinic, 12 Wade House Road, Shelf, Halifax HX3 7PB